OT: Magic lineament (was Re: [LMB] Sherwood, and epithets)

House of Unruly Fish carosue at centurytel.net
Thu, 05 Dec 2002 03:38:52 -0700

> > I was fixing the anchors on the kid's swingset and stuck
> > my left hand down on a nest of fire ants...  but that
> > hardly counts.

Ow, Pouncer.

I discovered the fun of fire ants when Mike and I toured through Texas 
summer before last.  I would have thought that ants would be asleep at 
night, but then, they were living under a big sodium security light in a 
seaside fishing park, and I guess maybe they thought it was day all the time.

It really does hurt much more than a person who's never run afoul of them 
would imagine it might.  But I was lucky to have a bottle of my Special 
Liniment with me, and it worked like a charm, although I still got the 
funny white bumps.  This is the recipe:

Get a bottle of green rubbing alcohol.  Then get some wintergreen 
oil--health food stores will sell it, or you can buy it in pint bottles on 
eBay to get a better price.  That way you can make it for all your friends 
and family and be the favorite.

You put 1 ounce of the oil in the alcohol, and also 30 plain aspirin 
tablets.  Make sure you X out the old label and write LINIMENT or something 
on the bottle.  Shake before using.  Don't use this if you are allergic to 
aspirin or any of the salicylate family.  DON'T let the kids get into 
it!  (But you already knew that.)

What this basically is, is liquid aspirin.  You can use it anywhere on your 
body surface that the stinging of the alcohol is not a problem (no eyes, 
mucous membranes, and so on).  It cuts pain sensation like magic and 
doesn't give you an upset stomach.

DON'T use it on sore muscles BEFORE a workout, though.  It is very very 
easy to overwork a strained muscle if you have blocked the pain from it, 
and you are likely to make the injury a lot worse without noticing until 
too late.

Can't beat it for fire ant bites and general aches, though.

Susan the Neon Nurse

++++++++++++++++++++++carosue at centurytel.net+++++++++++++++++++++