[LMB] Pat's questions for the females on the list OT:

[Anita]

On Nov 24, 2007 11:50 AM, Meg Justus <mmegaera at nwlink.com> wrote:

> <snip>
>
> The question I want asked is, if you didn't have all the underlying
> gender-based social assumptions to deal with, would you still want to be
> male?

Personally, I like being female.


> Things like the automatic assumption that it's the woman who has to juggle
> family and work (how many magazine articles have you seen about the struggle
> men have with this?).


Mum certainly was the one who chose to work part-time so she could be around
my younger brother and I but Dad was never working that late on a regular
basis either.


> The assumption that it's the woman who is the nester.


I never had that assumption. My parents are Christians and members of the
Australian Anglican Church. My father is not yet 50 and he's the older of
the two. The assumption in my family is that both my brother and I will have
children. My mum assumes that children are such a blessing that everyone
should have some. It's just as frustrating though.

Personally I don't want kids because I want to teach and I don't think I
could both have children and do the best for the kids in the classroom AND
the best for my own children. With environmental problems associated with
rising population, I  see it as far more important that  I help children
have an education than have my own children. This doesn't stop mum making
remarks about me being maternal when she gets the chance.

No matter what the assumption, real world situations will not fit it.


> The assumption that we're automatically physically weaker (yes, by and
> large, women aren't as strong as men, but there are some women who are
> stronger than some men, and it's the general assumption I object to),


Actually even the idea that by and large women aren't as strong as men is an
oversimplification. Men build upper body strength more easily than women.
Women develop lower body strength more easily. So a comparison of whose
"stronger" isn't will not work. Women also have a lower centre of gravity
which from a martial arts point of view is actually far more useful.



> and that we need to be taken care of, and that it's the man's job to do
> so.


These sorts of  assumptions are also heterocentric. I like feeling
protective and taking care of a partner, this was part of the relationship
dynamic with my ex-girlfriend who I was absolutely crazy about.

<snip>

> The whole gender specific husband/wife thing.  And so forth.  And so on.
> <snip>


 My parents certainly don't fit the cliches about that. Mum is the dominant
partner. Dad does the supermarket shopping, the ironing and tries to keep
the peace.  They both work. Mum has worked part-time in the past, she
currently works two jobs instead.

Anita