[LMB] OT: Gender Roles

Peter Hews Peterhews at protonmail.com
Sat Oct 2 12:11:07 BST 2021


On Saturday, October 2nd, 2021 at 02:19, B Van Look <vanlook19 at gmail.com> wrote:

> > > On Thu, 30 Sep 2021, Harvey Fishman wrote:
> > >
> > > > To my mind, the whole object here is the preservation of masculine
> > > >
> > > > desire,
> > >
> > > > which is really quite fragile but without which the human race is
> > > >
> > > > doomed.
> > >
> > > > Feminine desire is calendar based and much more sure.
>
> On Friday, October 1st, 2021 at 1:12 AM, Elizabeth Holden <
>
> > alzurite at gmail.com> wrote:
> >
> > Myself, I just raised my eyebrows, and wondered what species Harvey thinks
> >
> > > he was addressing.
>
> On Fri, Oct 1, 2021 at 9:46 AM tidsel via Lois-Bujold <
>
> lois-bujold at lists.herald.co.uk> wrote:
>
> > I read it as 'if humans can't procreate, there isn't much future. And if
> >
> > one party cannot function, then it does not work..
>
> Then you are very likely the exception to the rule, as Harvey's statement
>
> shows a very limited understanding of female sexuality as a majority of
>
> female-bodied people on this list experience it. This flavor of
>
> misunderstanding is painfully and all-too-frequently common.
>
> Female desire has been documented as FAR more based in cognition and mental
>
> space than Harvey states (calendar-based? seriously?!?!), FAR more based in
>
> cognition and mental space than male sexuality.
>
> Two books that can help clear up exactly that kind of mis-information and
>
> improve understanding of female sexuality and desire, for those with the
>
> courage to open them:
>
> Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex
>
> Life
>
> by Emily Nagoski
>
> https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00LD1ORBI
>
> and
>
> The Pleasure Gap: American Women and the Unfinished Sexual Revolution
>
> by Katherine Rowland
>
> https://www.amazon.com/Pleasure-Gap-American-Unfinished-Revolution-ebook/dp/B07RKW3FZ7
>

I'm familiar with the term "mansplaining," but we need another word when it's women telling another woman that she doesn't experience what she thinks she experiences (and recommending books to tell her what she ought to feel.)  Perhaps "matronising"?

Peter Hews

Oh better far to live and die under the brave black flag I fly,
Than play a sanctimonious part with a pirate head and a pirate heart.



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