[LMB] Miles, Ekaterin and the Orb

Laura Gallagher kelts at earthlink.net
Thu, 13 Nov 2003 20:08:05 -0600

Winter wrote:
---->I'm curious: what is it that makes Ekaterin real
to you?  Because I definitely belong to the first
group of people, and I'd like to see how others view
the character.  I WILL say that when we first met
Ekaterin in Komarr, I thought the character was
dead-on accurate for someone who was living with a man
like Tien.  But I just can't feel the Miles/Ekaterin
thing.  What is it that makes their relationship work
for you?

Been there, done that.  My usual comment about Komarr is that it didn't 
actually change my life - I was already busy doing that - but it made it 
all make SENSE to me.  I was stuck with a Tien.  I did have the same kind 
of background, down to similar advice from my parents about how to behave 
and react, and similar results in my life as an adult.  And it put me into 
the same kind of relationship, where I was putting up with bad treatment I 
didn't deserve, and always ending up feeling like it was somehow my fault, 
if there'd been a different woman in the relationship it would have come 
out better, etc.  The same tendency to dress for camouflage.  I even had 
the handicapped son who wasn't getting needed treatment because of the 
father.  As for the Miles/Ekaterin thing, I'm now in another, much better 
marriage, with a fellow Bujold fan, and we've commented on the parallels 
before.  It's not that he's just like Miles, but he's had most of the same 
positive effects on me that Miles had for Ekaterin.  (And I like to think 
that I've had some of the positive effects for him that Ekaterin had for 
Miles.)  I've had room to grow - maybe not a planet, but room to stretch 
out my arms.  The chance to have more children, and have my son taken good 
care of.  The chance to start to blossom, to feel more confident about 
myself, about my ability to speak out freely, to make my own decisions 
without second guessing myself so much, etc.  And as I've seen those 
changes in me, I've seen them in Ekaterin.  And I like seeing them in 
parallel, and want to see more.  So yeah, it works for me.

Laura Gallagher